My Very Own Walkthrough In Life...

To You...

2009-10-05T03:24:00.002+08:00

I feel like giving you love like I never did before. Pampering you like I never did before, Giving you every single happiness in life like you watched in the dramas and movies. If future may bring us together, I promised you will be loved and pampered like you never did before, I'll surpass the love given by your family. Eventhou, you didn't won the competition, you will always be Miss World to me, and if the times truly comes around where we are able to be one, i'll definitely crown you as my very own Miss Universe. I wish I were making jokes or drafing craps out of my simple energetic mind, but I think i'm not. Sincerely, Nixon. History had made you tougher, The past had trained you stronger, Nixon will make you happier if your willing to place your trust on me when time comes.. =)

Feelings I've never expect to be having...

2009-10-04T05:50:00.002+08:00

I'm happy to see you tonight, your name will be disclosed as P&C. If only you were available I wouldn't need to be holding back. Good night.

Eve, How are you?

2009-10-03T08:57:00.003+08:00

We met yesterday night, Eve, her presence made me felt like I've accomplish something eventhou the time spent with her is only a mere hour. I'm not sure why I got this feeling but then, I did. One more thing, I felt that she is not happy currently, so much secrets hidden behind those beautiful eyes that she is doing very well to cover it up. Well, I wish you well. I'll be here if you need me once again. That's all bout it. Finish talking bout Eve.

Hmmmph, there is this girl, she crossed my mind several times. The image of her smiling. I think she caught one of my organs that is in a Love Shape. Wondered why, she's the girl that I mention she's already taken. Yes, you.. =P

I'm missing your voice, the dialect you used so differently in Cantonese, I called, you didn't pick up.

Friday, October 2nd, Dry and Sunny Day.

2009-10-02T13:23:00.002+08:00

It's been few month since I blog, how are you? We did have a great run together this past few years yeah? I finally let go of you! heh, but not till the end of our complicated relationship on month July, Our anniversary where you started your very own complicated relationship with another guy named Sylvester. It still burn my eyes seeing you with him, In my heart it were always the same old *Eve, Please Don't Get Hurt, I'll Be Here If You Need Me* . Yesterday, you called and when i called you back, you didn't pick up then you told me you were having problems with your family and HIM, How is everything? Sincerely, I'm worried last night when i'm with them having fun.

I wonder will you see this post or not, I think you already forget I even have this blog about you yeah? Oh, another thing I have to mention, recently I met this girl or should I say, got abit more and more close eventhou we were just talking in a chat software, MSN Messenger, eventhou she might not be the prettiest girl in the neighbourhood but then her smile and personality caught my attention, so wish to move on or should I say approach but then, she's already taken.

So much happen this few month, my eldest sis got married on June in Dublin, Ireland and last month, September at Kuala Lumpur, Mandrin Oriental @ KLCC. Hehe, sweetest thing I been thru my whole life seeing the closest to me got a chance to start a family.

Working now, can't draft so much, I need to be going. I got so much to write but I don't know where to start.

October 2nd, 2009

2009-10-02T01:22:00.002+08:00

Too tired to draft a paragraph. Good Night, stay tuned...

Do You Think Of Me?

2009-02-20T00:24:00.001+08:00

I really miss you this few month, it's really hard hiding it from you and from others especially, shall we try it once more?

Hope and Wishes

2009-02-17T13:41:00.002+08:00

I hope that your okay, and wish that your well. May all the bad things ward off automatically. Just want to let you know that I'll be here if you need me, Eve. Love you and all the best.

Is Love Really That Complicated?

2009-02-10T14:42:00.004+08:00

I'm not going to write anything from my beneath my heart already since it just brought you shivers but not any feelings of joy or even sympathy towards it, it's just so sad. Hmmph, I'm feeling really down today, emotional, sad yet being surrounded by tons of unexplainable terms that need to be solve. I need you? no I should say I beg you, not to put a full stop - sign in our undone relationship. You may already have a huge Question Mark on me thinking how to describe this man. but I still think that I can really accomplish something that may save and use our remain feelings to build another harmonious and fullfilling love story again.

Please, Don't Put a Blockage In My Path From Doing So, You May Stop Yourself But Please Don't Stop Me From Doing So. I Love You Much.

I understand you but seems like you misunderstood me, Eve. We need to have another conversation like last night.

I'm Happy, To See You Thru Out The Night.

2009-02-01T05:49:00.002+08:00

Dear Eve,

It's been marvelous and absolutely spectacular seeing you tonight, you know? I miss you so much, I really do wish I could spend this festive season with you alone if there is a miracle that permits me to do so. I'd actually need to go home, but I choose to stay because I know I'm not going to be happy at my place. I'll just be thinking of you like last night. It's just so sad, that I'd have to really take alot of alcohol to make myself to sleep.

I love you, I can't describe the feeling when i see you, i got the urge to hug you so tight and don't want to let go and at the same time I have to really force myself hold on, back away because we are not the way we use to be. Couple?

I think there is something that you should really know. It only takes me 10 minutes to reach your friend's place because I really wanted to see you real bad. I'm speeding, but when I reach and your in my car I really want to drive slow. You nagged me, YES! I bluff it's not for safety measurement. It's just because I wish to see you abit longer alone... Just you and me in the car. I know it's really stupid but yeah, that's my reason... I love you, Eve. I really wish to be with you again.

p.s : There is alot more happened during this marvelous one year once festive season. I'm just not in that mood to write it all so, I'll write it later on when I'm happy.

Feelings That I Can't Describe.

2009-01-31T14:30:00.002+08:00

I am just moodless without you.

I Really Wish To See Her!!!

2009-01-17T19:21:00.002+08:00

I Don't Know How To Express My Current Feelings, I Really Want To See You, Eve!

Why Can't You See It?

2009-01-16T15:38:00.002+08:00

Please my love, don't ever switch to another topic just to ignore me. You forgot what you told me the other day at the car, or maybe it's just not that important for you. Or maybe I'm just being over-reacted? I don't know why at this very moment eventhou your talking bout me and my sis wedding it's hurting my heart, and it's aching really badly.

I know I doesn't have the authority to do so, infront of you cause I'm just a nobody. I does know now? The other day I tried so hard and you said your not going anywhere. Today you tell me a totally different story, IT'S JUST SO SAD.

I just don't know how to tell you this in a direct instant-messages such as msn, sms or on the phone. I just hope you'll see this later on, and you'll understand? Or will I be accused as ' Who the hell are you?'. I am really afraid. I really do when I have the thoughts that in your heart I am merely a puppet on a broken strings that is worst than a friend you despise most.

Love, Nixon

Will You Still Love Me?

2009-01-15T20:45:00.002+08:00

Eve, it's happy to see you yesterday eventhou it's just for a moment. Facing you now it's really different because it's been so long we had a conversation inside a car. I wanted to hug you really when I got in your car.

I wonder and wonder, why? why could it be like this now, and the things you wrote in the sms yesterday got me questioning myself is it really doesn't worth to get back your love? After sometime it's really clear to me that I still miss you so very much and I could do whatever it takes to have you back by myside.

Eve, Please, without you life it's so much more incomplete and at the same time everything I did or going to do, it just lack of something that will encourage me to do better. Will you still love me, if I say I'm still holding the memory that you once implanted in my mind to keep my everyday life going?

I love you, Thanks for giving me a chance to see you.

I'm Happy To See Her.

2009-01-12T00:30:00.003+08:00

When to Poppy last night. Guess what? The most unpredictable things happened, Eve was there too she came by at almost 1 a.m plus and I was so happy to see her, we hugged each other, we kissed although she will just treat it as a normal friend kiss. But sincerely I treated it like last time still, my darling.

No doubt, it was fun I could dance with her, I could hug her. Due to the influence of alcohol, but still it was memorable, i even got wasted. She taken care of me like I do to her last time when we were having trip to Phuket, Thailand. I was happy she accompany up to my place and put me on my bed and even helped me to take off my socks?

Even given me a good night kissed before she left, i wanted to make her stay a lil' longer but I'm just too drunk? I don't even have the energy to raise my head from the bed. I was mad at that time. But still I should be thankful it happen. Yet felt sorry I din't get her home myself.. I love you, girl.

Lonely and Just Need Her...

2009-01-10T07:56:00.000+08:00

I webcam with Eve last night, it was just so sweet and it makes me feel so delighted that i finally can see her face as long as I can since we're over. I lost that chance. Yesterday was totally satisfaction, I don't know when was the last time I had that feeling, feeling of joy and happiness just by talking to her thru msn messenger while she switch on her's webcam.

She hasn't changed much, her hair is still silky smooth and nontheless long as usual which i love to hold so much back to the days we're together. Her pair of eyes that is still so mesmerising, and especially her smile that truly makes me feel happy just by taking a glance over it.

What can i say more? I still miss her really much. I actually shed tears when i just looked at her. staring at her while she was just watching tv, because it just brings back so much memories. I just can't accept the fact that i lost her. After 3 years. And i just want to apologize for that lame joke i made. I'm so stupid, but hey i'm not like that no more, I'd changed. Still I'm so sorry.

Forgive Me Please, Eve?

Hope I Could Talk To You Again In Messenger Soon, Like Last Night?

The Silence Has Finally Broken.

2009-01-09T00:51:00.000+08:00

My name is Nixon, i'm going to turn 21 this year and I am still nothing, still have no career and failed in my education and that makes me really sick of myself. But finally, today everything change in the year of 2009, the first time in my life it's so clear to me on what I am suppose to do. This is the best feeling ever.

It finally come clear that I wasn't suppose to study when i finish my year in secondary school, study was the thing that I will never be good at but still i try and try to accomplish it, trying so hard that everytime i will just ended failing so misery that it's hard for me to stand up, throughout the year i was accompanied by my girlfriend, no i should say ex-girlfriend because we finally broken up after 3 years straight dissappointing her over and over again because of my incompetence in my education. I'm so sorry girl. Sincerely, I apologize Eve. I owe you too much.

It makes me want to cry losing you. Your always so innocence yet so brilliance in guiding me. So, everyone said is a new year and everything comes new in this time of life. I really hope so, 09 I finally will be someone and something that everyone will look up to. I won't dissappoint anyone ever again I promise. I will start with working in my father's security firm, from the bottom offcourse. Someday, I'm sure i'll be able to take over his place as Chairman of the company. Till then, let me just flash back to some sweet memories i've gone thru with her.